


Baby it's you

by subak_jumokbap



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Boyfriends, College, Fluff, High School, Jisung's in high school, M/M, mark's in college, marksung, mentioned jaehyuck, soft, very self-indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-04
Updated: 2019-02-04
Packaged: 2019-10-22 10:26:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17660930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/subak_jumokbap/pseuds/subak_jumokbap
Summary: According to Mark’s friends, Mark has a baby boyfriend. Whatever that means.





	Baby it's you

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Birthday Park Jisung!

Jaemin’s droning on about something Mark’s lost interest in about fifteen minutes ago. He nods his head every once in a while to act like he’s listening while all he’s really doing is waiting for his phone to light up with a notification. He pokes at his sad excuse of a broccoli and eyes his phone beside his plate. As if on cue, it buzzes and lights up, showing one new text. Two new texts. Three new texts from Jisung. He smiles to himself.

 

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_Send help. Chenle’s gonna talk my ear off_

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_Chenle says hi btw_

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_This baby lion looks exactly like you!! >~<_

_A_ nother buzz. It’s a picture of a cute lion cub yawning. Mark laughs under his breath and types out a speedy reply.

 

**_Me_ **

_That lion is my spirit animal_

**_Me_ **

_Tell Chenle hi. Then tell him to spare my boyfriend from his rants_

**_Me_ **

_Tell my boyfriend I miss him too_

It’s sappy but he really does. Miss his boyfriend. It’s not like he isn’t used to not having Jisung around. He was in college for a whole two years without Jisung and he’s now in his third year. But the first year doesn’t count because they weren’t together then (but it secretly counts because he was pining). He only started dating Jisung in his second year. So he spent one whole year being a boyfriend-less boyfriend though it’s not that bad when they call and text frequently. So technically, he _can_ do without having Jisung around but everything is a lot better when Jisung is.

 

He locks his phone and looks back up at his friends, trying to subtly sneak back into the conversation they were having. He makes eye contact with Jaemin and the look Jaemin sends him tells him he’s been caught.

 

“Hand it over.”

 

“What?”

 

“Your phone!” Jaemin states annoyedly.

 

Mark clamps his hand down over his phone protectively. “It’s _my_ phone, why should I give it to you?”

 

“Because!” Jaemin seethes as he reaches out to grab it. Mark struggles to push his hand away. “You’ve been smiling at it like a fool and ignoring us. And this isn’t the first time. Or the tenth time for that matter.”

 

“Let him live,” Renjun pipes up in a bored tone from beside Mark. His head is resting in his palm and his eyes are glued to his notes on the table. “He misses his _Cute Jisungie_. You’re just jealous you don’t have anyone to be stupid and giggly over.”

Mark takes offence. “I’m not stupid and giggly over Jisung! And how did you even know about _Cute Jis_ -“ Mark turns to him looking slightly flustered, “Have you been reading over my shoulder?”

 

Renjun shrugs, looking not in the slightest bit guilty. “You didn’t say I couldn’t look.”

 

“There’s this basic thing called privacy!”

 

To think Renjun hadn’t peel his eyes away from his notes the entire time. He’s frighteningly sneaky.

 

“Really? _Cute Jisungie_?” Donghyuck scrunches his face in disgust. “And here I thought you were incapable of showing affection.”

 

“You saved his number with a nickname but not for ours?” Jaemin pouts. “We’re your best friends.”

 

“And he’s my _boyfriend_.”

 

“Whom you try so hard to hide from us,” Donghyuck remarks.

 

“Yeah, I still don’t get it. It’s not like we’re going to kidnap him or anything.” Renjun flips the page over. He’s frighteningly good at multi-tasking as well.

 

“I’m not… hiding him from you guys.” Mark fidgets. “I talk about him sometimes and answer his calls in front of you. You know it’s not like that.”

 

“But you also look like you want to bolt whenever we start discussing about him, or the two of you in general,” Donghyuck points out.

 

The thing is, he’s fine with talking about Jisung if he initiates it. But once his friends start poking deeper and getting more curious about his relationship, he tends to retreat. He’s only fine with it if he’s in control of where the conversation is going. It’s not that he’s embarrassed to talk about Jisung with them, hell, he can go on about how wonderful Jisung is for hours. It’s just he doesn’t want to share everything - he wants to keep Jisung to himself. He has this irrational fear that if they get to know more about Jisung, they’ll probably be charmed by him as well. It’s stupid, he knows, but he thinks he’s allowed to be selfish about his boyfriend every once in a while.

 

“It’s because I _do_ want to run away from you idiots. All the time.”

 

“That’s too bad then,” Jaemin says as he brings his palms down onto the table determinedly. “Because you can’t run away from this Friday’s outing.”

 

“I am _not_ going-”

 

“You nodded your head when we asked,” Renjun counters.

 

“Just how do you see all these things when you don’t even look up!”

 

Renjun shrugs in response. Donghyuck snickers and leans forward. “You _did_ nod, you know. He’s not making it up.”

 

Mark groans. He must have nodded unknowingly because he was too busy texting Jisung.

 

He sighs, resigned to his fate. “Okay can someone at least tell me what exactly went on during the conversation? Other than the fact that there’s an outing on Friday. What did I miss?”

 

There’s a twinkle in Donghyuck’s eyes and Mark already knows he’s not going to like the reply that’s about to come out from his mouth. “Your _baby boyfriend_. You miss your baby boyfriend.”

 

Renjun and Jaemin burst into laughter while Mark sinks into his seat, his arms folded against his chest. “You’re all mean. Piss off.”

 

“Oh I’m leaving alright,” Jaemin says as he stands with his tray. Donghyuck follows suit. “And you better leave too unless you wanna be late and get attendance points minus off.”

 

Mark grumbles and is about to stand to do the same when his phone buzzes again.

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_He misses you too._

Mark tries hard to fight the smile threatening to form on his face.

 

“Whipped,” a small whisper greets his ear.

 

Mark jumps in his seat at the sudden intrusion. “Seriously!” He turns to glare at Renjun and clutches his phone to his chest. “ _Privacy!”_

 

—-

 

Renjun’s typing furiously on his laptop. He’s sitting cross-legged on his bed with his laptop perched on his lap. He scrunches his eyebrows together as he reads what he’s written so far.

 

“You have to come on Friday. I don’t care.”

 

Mark doesn’t understand how he can fully focus on two things at the same time. He’s heard of multi-tasking but Renjun brings it to a whole new level.

 

Mark keeps his back to Renjun, trying to pour all his attention to the assignment he’s been working on. He taps his pencil against his study table, trying to recall the formula he needs in order to solve the question.

 

“I don’t want to. You know I don’t like to drink.”

 

“That’s why you need to go. Someone has to be the responsible one and I don’t want to be it.”

 

Jaemin and Donghyuck are out of the question because it’s due to them that there has to be a responsible person present. The two can’t be left drinking alone, unless someone’s asking for total chaos.

 

“I can’t take care of three drunken guys on my own,” Mark says.

 

“Then drink with us! Then we all have to take care of each other’s drunken asses.”

 

Mark replies comes out as a low mumble but clear enough for Renjun to hear. “But I don’t drink...”

 

The sound of typing stops momentarily and the only sound is the tapping of Mark’s pencil against the wooden table.

 

“You know, I’ve always wondered what that’s about. You suddenly deciding not to drink.”

 

Mark stops the tapping, promptly putting the pencil down on top of his paper. There’s no point in recalling a formula he hadn’t memorise in the first place. He turns in his swivel chair to face Renjun.

 

He scratches the back of his head. “It’s just a promise I made with someone...”

 

Renjun raises his eyebrows at him, waiting for him to elaborate. But Mark’s tired and he knows he’ll get teased if he explains further so he doesn’t.

 

Instead he sighs and gives in because he knows he’ll never win against three stubborn, hard-headed devils. “Fine, I’ll go on Friday but you’re not allowed to get too wasted. I’ll need help managing the two.”

 

If Renjun notices that Mark hadn’t elaborated on his answer, he doesn’t say so. “If that means you’re going, then fine by me. I wasn’t planning on getting shit-faced drunk either.”

 

Renjun stretches his hands above his head and pushes his laptop away from his lap. Mark’s too familiar with this routine. He watches Renjun eye the room, trying to find where he had hung his towel and-

 

“Dibs on the shower,” Mark calls out.

 

Renjun exclaims in protest. “I was going to shower first! You can’t do that!”

 

“Yes I can.” Mark replies smugly. He likes to think of it as a small payback for making him go for Friday’s outing. He takes his glasses off and stands to retrieve his towel hanging in front of his wardrobe. He figures a shower will do him good to clear his mind and then maybe he’ll continue on that assignment again after feeling refreshed. He opens his wardrobe to take out his clothes and once he’s done he peeks his head out from between the wardrobe doors.

 

“Rules are whoever calls dibs first, gets it.” He smiles to Renjun sweetly and walks slowly towards their shared bathroom just to shove it into Renjun’s face.

 

Renjun scowls at him. “If you don’t come out in fifteen, I’m barging in no matter if you’re done or not. Rule number two.”

 

 

In fact Mark comes out in ten, droplets of water dripping from his bangs. He grabs the towel hanging round his neck and whips Renjun’s legs to tell him that it’s his turn. Renjun dismisses him with a lazy wave of his hand, too engrossed in watching some video on his phone with his earphones plugged in.

 

Mark plops down onto his bed and scrolls through his phone. He’s thinking of watching a few videos before starting on his assignment again when he gets a call. He sees the caller ID and leans back against the headboard to make himself comfortable.

 

He clears his throat and answers. “Hey.” He glances over at Renjun who still has his earphones on.

 

“Hi hyung,” Jisung says from the other end. “I hope I’m calling at a good time.”

 

Always so considerate.

 

“Yeah, I just finished showering. Just lazing around on my bed before doing some work.”

 

“I can see you doing that,” Jisung laughs.

 

Mark smiles. “Like you aren’t doing the same either. How was your day?”

 

He hears rustling on the other end and he imagines Jisung getting comfortable on his bed. It looks so cute even if it’s just in his head.

 

“Pretty boring. Like any other day. Chenle was going on about his cute Math tutor again.”

 

“The college kid right? Jeno, was it?”

 

“Yeah. Actually I saw him at Chenle’s doorstep when Chenle and I were walking home. He _is_ kinda cute. He’s tall too.”

 

“What, am I not cute and tall enough for you?” Mark asks.

 

Jisung laughs and it’s such a pretty sound no matter how many times he’s heard it. “Cute, sure. But the height? Can’t really say much about that.”

 

“Park Jisung.”

 

“Mark Lee,” Jisung copies with a smugness to it.

 

Mark breaks into a laugh and hears Jisung joining in. He misses how playful Jisung can be. He eyes the polaroid of them among the other polaroid he’s pasted on the wall beside his bed. He had been the one to take it. He remembers it clearly. It was one of the hottest day of the summerthat year and they’ve just raced up the hill at the park near their house. The sun shines brightly in the background and Mark’s kissing Jisung’s cheek while Jisung has his head thrown back in laughter. It’s also the same picture as his phone wallpaper.

 

“I wish you were here,” Mark says in a sudden confession. He hears silence on the other end and then a small sigh.

 

“I miss you too hyung,” Jisung says softly. The way he says it clutches at his heart. Jisung’s words always have a way of affecting him.

 

Mark slides down to lie on his bed and he turns on his side to face the wall. “Is school okay? I remember the last year of high school being really tough.”

 

“Hmm that was three years ago right?” Jisung pokes at him. “I’m doing okay, everything’s going fine. But what about you? Have you been eating and sleeping enough? I hope I don’t have to go all the way there just to spoon-feed you and tuck you into bed.”

 

Jisung’s younger than Mark. It’s pretty obvious. But moments like this, where Jisung worries and fusses over him, Mark can’t help but feel that he’s mature beyond his years. It’s just how he is. That side of him has always been there, even before they were together. When Mark kept being anxious about college applications, Jisung was the one who calmed him down and told him it would turn out fine. When he was nervous about the speech he had to give at his graduation, Jisung had held his hand as he rehearsed it the day before. Jisung, who rushed to the pharmacist to get him his medicine when his parents were away at a business trip. Jisung, who hugged him and wiped his tears when his grandad passed away. He tells himself how lucky he is to have Jisung. He’s grateful every single day.

 

“Is that what it takes for you to come here? Then I’ll starve myself and go without sleep till you arrive.”

 

“That’s not funny,” Jisung says in an upset manner. “You should always eat and rest well hyung.”

 

Park Jisung will really be the death of him.

 

“Of course, don’t worry Sung, I am.”

 

“But is it ok if I really do?”

 

“Do what?”

 

“Come over to where you are,” Jisung says quietly. “Can I do that?”

 

Mark thinks it’s possible for him to melt right there and then. “I’d like that a lot,” Mark tells him softly. “But only when you’re not too busy. I don’t want you to go out of your way to come here. It _is_ about two and a half hours away you know.”

 

“I know,” Jisung replies, as if the long journey isn’t a huge problem. (It is, it’s really horrible).

 

“I’ll try to come back often.”

 

“But don’t overwork yourself just to do that,” Jisung tells him. “I can wait if it means you’re healthy.”

 

It’s really not fair how Jisung says these things so naturally, not knowing the degree of impact it has on Mark. It comforts him yet leaves him breathless. It makes warmth bloom in his chest and occupies his mind late at night. 

 

“You should be healthy too.”

 

“I’m three years younger, you _wish_ you had my health.”

 

“I wish you’d stop bragging about it.”

 

Jisung lets out a laugh and then when it dies down, a yawn follows. Mark glances at the clock at the corner of the room. It’s a quarter to midnight.

 

“I guess it’s time for me to let you go huh.”

 

“You should hurry up and sleep too. Don’t stay up too late.”

 

“I won’t, don’t worry. Go to sleep Sung,  I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

 

“G’night hyung.” Another yawn. Mark smiles fondly at the sound.

 

“Love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

The call ends and Mark stares at his phone wallpaper for a little too long.

 

“I really want to meet your baby boyfriend. He sounds cute.”

 

Mark groans at the interruption and turns to the side of the room Renjun is at. Renjun is smirking at him, his earphones no longer in his ear. Mark grabs his pillow and throws it at Renjun’s face.

 

“Privacy! We talked about this!”

 

Renjun lets out a bout of coughs and hurls the pillow back. “Rule number three, no such thing as privacy in a shared dorm room, unless you’re in the toilet. And that should only last for fifteen minutes according to rule number two.”

 

“Go and shower before I kick your ass.” Mark grits out.

 

“Rule number four states that there shall be no kicking of- No wait I’m just kiddi- Oww!”

 

—-

 

The music is too loud. It’s a pop number Mark’s heard too many times before, though he doesn’t really know what song it is. The bass is loud and repetitively annoying, but he thinks his friends are out to challenge that and crown themselves the loudest and most annoying in the restaurant.

 

It’s Friday night and they’re at a chicken place and of course there are drinks as well, though Mark’s glass is filled with soda.

 

Jaemin and Donghyuck are cheering about a joke one of them had just made. They’re boisterous and clingy and hardly mindful of their antics. Mark thinks they’ve shared about three bottles between themselves. He had also made it a point to note how much Renjun’s consumed as well because he really needs Renjun to be sober. Thankfully Renjun’s only had a few glasses, a number far below what he can usually handle. Renjun’s laughing along with them and to be frank, Mark’s having a great time as well. It’s been a while since they’ve gone out like this and although it sounds like they’re a handful, they’re a great bunch to be with. It’s always fun and enjoyable, that is until someone starts throwing up or picking up a fight. That’s the part where Mark needs a sober partner.

 

Donghyuck pours a glass and slides it towards Mark. “Come on, just one glass, it won’t hurt.”

 

Mark winces and shakes his hands to refuse it. “It’s ok, I don’t wanna drink.”

 

“Why not though? I know we’ve asked before but you always go around it,” Jaemin speaks up as he brings a piece of cubed radish to his mouth.

 

Renjun looks over at Mark warily and reaches out to take the glass that Donghyuck’s poured for him. “Hey if he doesn’t want to drink, let him be.”

 

He downs the glass in one gulp. Mark would have chided him if it weren’t for the fact that he was trying to help.

 

“We’re just concerned. Is it... health related?” Donghyuck hesitates as he asks. “You _would_ tell us something like that right?”

 

Mark scoffs. “No, I’m not dying if that’s what you’re asking.”

 

Mark thinks about it and honestly, the reason isn’t that big of a deal. It’s nothing to be secretive about. It was a sensitive issue back then, but he feels okay to bring it up now.

 

“I made a promise with Jisung about it.”

 

Renjun looks apprehensive at the broach of topic since he wasn’t ready to talk about it then. But he thinks he is now. He appreciates how Renjun looks ready to back him up if he feels uncomfortable. He should tell Renjun that he can afford to relax.

 

“He doesn’t like it when you drink?” Jaemin asks curiously.

 

“It’s not that. It’s just, he was a minor then and I didn’t want him to feel left out. We talked about it once and he says it feels like there’s a huge gap between us because I can do all these things and he can’t.”

 

Mark’s never really discussed this with his friends before. But it’s an issue of the past and he’s comfortable with talking about it now. They’re okay now.

 

“He said he feels like he’s holding me back from doing things, which is ridiculous really. He’s the reason I’m able to go forward and do so many things I wouldn’t usually do.”

 

Renjun leans back against his chair and there’s a smile of relief on his face. He looks at Mark like a dad would as he watches his child ride a bike successfully for the first time. Mark gives him a smile in return.

 

“Man, that’s.. that’s really sweet,” Jaemin says and there’s a soft look in his eyes. Thankfully he’s not drunk enough to start crying about it.

 

“Now you got me feeling bad about all the times we suggested going out for drinks,” Donghyuck says guiltily. “This one included.”

 

Mark smiles at him. “It’s fine, you guys never forced me to drink anyway.”

 

“Okay, but since we’re on this subject, let’s keep it rolling,” Jaemin says with a sudden spike of interest. “Who confessed between the two of you?”

 

“Guys, let’s not push it...” Renjun warns them, watching for Mark’s reaction.

 

“No, it’s fine. If I don’t want to talk about it I’ll be sure to make it clear,” Mark tells him. “I did, I confessed and then I asked him out.”

 

Jaemin literally squeals but thankfully there’s another rowdy group beside their table so they aren’t the loudest ones there anymore.

 

“Who initiated the first kiss?” Renjun jumps in, seeing how Mark is okay with the flow of conversation.

 

Mark feels a blush coming but he answers it as directly as possible. “He did.”

 

Jaemin lets out another squeal and Donghyuck gives a low whistle. “Damn, your baby boyfriend got moves.”

 

“Actually I’ve always wondered,” Mark ponders out loud, “why do you guys keep calling him that?”

 

“Baby boyfriend?”

 

Mark nods.

 

“Because he’s in high school,” Jaemin supplies.

 

“And you’re in college,” Donghyuck continues for him.

 

“And the way you talk about him makes him sound like a cute little baby,” Renjun rounds it up. “Relax, it’s not anything _bad_.”

 

“It’s a term of endearment really,” Donghyuck adds in.

 

“Endearment?” Mark repeats amusedly. “You’ve never even met him.”

 

“Which we should! When can we meet him? I really want to meet your baby.” Jaemin bounces in his seat excitedly.

 

Mark who had been sipping on his soda through a straw, chokes and pounds his fist against his chest. “He’s not my _baby_.”

 

“Well he’s not _our_ baby now, is he?” Donghyuck teases. “Although, I wouldn’t mind-”

 

“Shut it,” Mark groans. “Don’t continue that sentence.”

 

Mark’s phone on the table suddenly lights up and the vibration catches all of their attention. Their eyes fall onto the caller ID and Mark quickly snatches his phone before any of them can beat him to it.

 

He sucks in a deep breath at his quick save, much to the disappointment of his friends.

 

“Jisung?”

 

(“Put him on speaker!” “We wanna talk to him!”)

 

“Hyung? It’s really noisy on your end. Bad timing?”

 

“No, I’m just out with my friends.” Mark sends them a glare so they’d quieten down, but now they’re making stupid gestures asking for him to put the Jisung on speaker. He doesn’t know why he puts up with them.

 

“They want to talk to you. Are you okay with that?”

 

“Talk to me?” Jisung sounds anxious. “What for?”

 

“They’re just curious. It’s ok if you don’t want to. You can say no.”

 

“No, it’s ok. Sure, I’ll do it.”

 

“Okay hold on, let me put you on speaker.”

 

Mark covers his phone with one hand and lowers his voice. “Please behave, nothing sexual and don’t scare him or anything.”

 

“We would never!”

 

Mark squints at them and puts his phone on the table, pressing the speaker button.

 

“Sung you’re on speaker now.”

 

“Uhh, hi Mark hyung’s friends.”

 

“He sounds adorable!” Jaemin gushes.

 

“Hi Mark’s baby boyfriend!”

 

“We’ve been dying to talk to you!”

 

Jisung laughs awkwardly. “Uhhh nice to meet- I mean talk to you. I’ve heard about you guys from Mark.”

 

“Us too. We’d love to meet you in person,” Jaemin says, leaning closer to the phone.

 

Donghyuck leans in too so that he can be heard clearly. “Yeah we wanna meet the person who makes Mark giggly and have this stupid look on his face and become oblivious to everything around him.”

 

Jisung laughs and Mark can tell he’s enjoying it. “Does he really? That’s interesting to hear.”

 

Renjun gives Mark a mischievous smile as he leans in to the phone as well. Mark’s starting to regret this whole thing. “Yeah not to mention whenever your calls end, he’ll stare at the picture of-”

 

“Okay! That’s quite enough,” Mark cuts in, grabbing his phone and turning off the speaker function.

 

He turns his head to the side and leans away from his friends as much as possible. “Hey, Sung sorry about that, they can be a bit overwhelming.”

 

There’s a collective protest in the background.

 

Jisung giggles. “They sound like fun.”

 

“Only when they’re not being annoying,” Mark laughs. “Listen Sung, I’ll call you again once I’m back at the dorms if it’s not too late. No, actually I think I’ll call you tomorrow morning. You’ll probably be asleep when I get back.”

 

“Call me still?” Jisung says and there’s a slight waver to his voice. “Even if it’s just for five minutes.”

 

There’s something about the way he says it. It’s different and it’s unlike his usual cheery self. Like there’s something bothering him. Mark pushes down the anxiety that’s bubbling up, he doesn’t want to jump into things. If there’s one thing he’s learnt about Jisung, it’s that he’s like a kitten. You have to approach it slowly for it to open up to you.

 

“Sung, is everything okay?”

 

“Everything’s fine,” Jisung assures him but goes quiet all of a sudden. Mark waits patiently for him to continue. “It just... it gets lonely sometimes. Sometimes... sometimes-“ he pauses, and then, “forget it, it’s stupid.”

 

Mark frowns. “No, it’s not. Tell me. It’s me, you can tell me anything.”

 

“Sometimes I just miss you a lot, that’s all.” He laughs timidly. “It’s pretty stupid isn’t it.”

 

Mark’s heart drops and he wishes he could reach out and hold him. To push everything away and run to where he is and hug him till he feels better. Till he can make up for the time they’ve spent apart and make him forget what it’s like to feel lonely. To just be there when he needs him. But he can’t do that and it makes him feel even worse.

 

Mark eyes the door of the restaurant, hoping to find an easy way out to get some privacy but it’s extremely crowded and he would have to elbow through throngs of people before he can finally get outside. He’s bound to end up bumping into some intoxicated stranger while doing that and he’s not really up for the consequences that follow. So he has to make do with the situation.

 

“No, it’s not. I miss you a lot too. I’m sorry I can’t go back often.” Mark sticks nearer to the wall behind him to move as far away from the noise of the restaurant as possible. “But I promise I’ll call you once I get back. We’ll talk then, ok?”

 

“Ok.” Jisung says in a lighter tone. “I’ll try to wake up when you do.”

 

He sounds slightly better than he did before. But Mark needs to make sure he really _is_ alright. He figures his friends will be ok with calling it a night slightly earlier than usual.

 

“But I don’t want you to stay awake waiting ok?”

 

“Ok hyung, I got it,” he laughs.

 

“And Jisung? I love you.”

 

“Me too. I love you too.”

 

The call ends and Mark looks down at his phone, thinking about Jisung – about what he’s feeling and what’s going through his mind, before sighing and keeping his phone in his pocket. He shifts back to the table.

 

Jaemin is looking at him with big, wide eyes and Donghyuck is unnervingly quiet. Mark turns to Renjun for some sort of explanation but Renjun just shrugs in response.

 

“Okay, did I miss out on something again?” He scans their faces one by one and when he gets to Donghyuck, he says, “And don’t you dare say Jisung. I miss him, but that’s not the point here.”

 

“I didn’t know you guys exchanged ‘I love you’s already!” Jaemin exclaims, breaking out of his stance, his hands at his cheeks. “That’s really big!”

 

Apparently he didn’t get as much privacy as he thought. He scratches the back of his head, suddenly hyper-conscious of everything. “I mean it’s normal to say it, isn’t it?”

 

“When did you start saying them?” Donghyuck asks quietly.

 

“Like four months ago?” Mark looks at him carefully, unsure why he’s asking.

 

“And you’re together for about a year and a few months now right?”

 

“A year and three months,” Mark provides. “When- when did you and Jaehyun hyung start saying them?”

 

“Around that time in our relationship as well.”

 

“This year is your third year together isn’t it?” Renjun asks, turning his head in his palm to face Donghyuck.

 

Donghyuck nods. He looks at Mark, speaking only after a few beats of silence. “You know, I think Jisung is good for you.”

 

Mark doesn’t know what sparked it but he takes it anyway. “Thanks. I think so too.”

 

—-

 

Jaemin and Renjun are dozing off, their heads leaning against each other while Donghyuck is playing a game on his phone. It’s the only lecture they have together (since they all have different majors) but none of them can really be bothered since it’s not a graded module. Mark tries hard to concentrate on the slides because _one_ of them have to be taking down notes so that they can at least pass, but it’s really dry and boring. And it’s late in the evening so his brain isn’t really at a hundred percent efficiency. He bets it’s not even at fifty percent efficiency. The only comfort he has is that it’s ending in ten minutes and that it’s the last lecture of the day.

 

His phone buzzes.

 

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_Hyung are you having a lecture now?_

**_Me_ **

_Yeah. Something up?_

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_Where’s your lecture at_

Mark frowns as he reads Jisung’s text. That’s weird, Jisung never really asks about these kind of things. Because there’s no point in him asking when they go to different schools. But then again, Jisung always asks the weirdest things.

 

**_Me_ **

_North wing, Hall B. Why are you asking?_

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_Just wondering. Waiting for something, got bored. Heh ^_^_

Mark laughs at the reply. So typical of him.

 

**_Me_ **

_I’ll be done in five. I’ll call you_

**_Cute Jisungie_ **

_Videocall me!! >~<_

Mark waits impatiently for their professor to dismiss them and when he does, Mark shoves everything in his bag and leaves. He tells his friends he’ll catch up with them later. He walks out of the lecture hall and videocalls Jisung. Jisung picks up and all Mark sees is an eyeball. Again, very typical of him.

 

“Sung, I like your eyes but I would really like to see your face.”

 

“Hyung don’t you get it? I see only you!” Jisung laughs. “You’ve ended your lecture?”

 

“Yup, I’m trying to find an empty bench somewhere so I can talk to you.”

 

Jisung still hasn’t moved the camera away from his eye.

 

“Are there no empty seats around? Would you rather call me back after you’ve found a seat?”

 

“No it’s ok, I can do it simultaneously. You said you were bored waiting for something. What are you waiting for?”

 

“Someone, but he’s not here yet.”

 

“Chenle?”

 

“No, not Chenle.” Jisung scrunches his face. “I ditched him actually.”

 

Mark walks past Hall A hoping there’ll be an empty bench round the corner. “Who is it then?”

 

“Oh, he’s almost here!”

 

“Oh? Should I end the call then?”

 

Jisung finally brings the camera away from his eye to show a better view of himself. It shows him smiling brightly and sitting on a bench. In fact the bench is eerily similar to the benches in Mark’s school. The painting behind him also looks like the painting he walks past to get to Hall B, and the big potted plant beside the bench is also almost exactly the same as the plant placed near the bench he has to pass by. Wait-

 

“You should probably end the call,” Jisung tells him with a grin.

 

“Wait, Sung-” Mark tries to get a hold of him but the calls ends there. He inhales as he absorbs all these indications and he starts to quicken his steps. He _knows_ where that bench is. He starts running and his eyes dart around frantically, in case he sees a familiar mop of hair, or a pair of worn-out shoes he’s too used to seeing. His heart pounds hard in his chest. His hands are shaking and he has no idea why he’s feeling so nervous. Jisung can’t possibly be here. It can’t be.

 

He turns the corner and right there, standing in front of the very bench is his Jisung.

 

“Hyung!” Jisung exclaims. He waves and his smile is bright and overwhelming.

 

Mark gulps and takes in a few deep breaths. “Jisung,” he laughs disbelievingly. “You’re here.”

 

“I’m here!”

 

“I can’t believe it,” Mark says as he walks closer to Jisung. “When? Why didn’t you tell me?”

 

Jisung starts walking towards him too just to quickly reduce the distance between them. “It’s a surprise hyung.” He smiles. “If I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise.”

 

Jisung stops right in front of him and his smile is so bright and blinding it actually hurts. It hurts Mark so much thinking of how long he’s gone without seeing that smile. He wraps his arms around Jisung’s waist and lifts him up (even though it’s hard when Jisung’s slightly taller) and twirls him around.

 

Jisung half-laughs and half-screams till Mark lets his feet touch the ground again. Mark nuzzles his head against the side of Jisung’s neck. “God, you’re really here.”

 

Jisung nods and wraps his arms around Mark’s body. “I am.”

 

“I’m so happy to see you, you don’t even know.”

 

“I think I do.” Jisung hums. “I miss this. I miss your warm hugs.”

 

Would Jisung laugh if Mark started crying? Because Mark thinks he can cry just about any time now.

 

Jisung pulls back and takes in Mark’s face. “Do you like my surprise?”

 

Mark nods because it feels like words are stuck in his throat.

 

“That’s a relief.” Jisung kisses his cheek and the sensation of Jisung’s lips against his skin makes his skin tingle and his stomach flutter. He turns his head to chase after Jisung’s lips but he hears a very loud and poor imitation of a cough. He knows that sound anywhere. He groans and drops his head on Jisung’s shoulder.

 

“Are those your friends?” Jisung whispers.

 

Mark lifts his head and turns to face them. He rests one hand around Jisung’s waist. “No, I don’t know them,” Mark says loud and clear. “Let’s go Jisung.”

 

“I’m disappointed in you Mark Lee.” Donghyuck chides. He sends Jisung a wide smile. “We’re his best friends. You must be Jisung.”

 

“That’s me,” he laughs. He bows politely. “Nice to meet you.”

 

“Gosh he’s so cute! Can we keep him?” Jaemin coos. “I’m Jaemin. This guy’s Donghyuck and that’s Renjun.”

 

“Ahh, the famous _Cute Jisungie._ We’ve been waiting forever to meet Mark’s baby boyfriend,” Renjun remarks.

 

Jisung turns to Mark with a questioning look. Mark shakes his head to tell him to ignore them.

 

“We’re heading to a noodle place outside of school. You should join us,” Jaemin says.

 

“Sure I’d love that,” Jisung smiles sweetly and dammit, Mark’s sure Jaemin’s already charmed.

 

“Alright, follow us kid. We’ll take care of you,” Donghyuck says with a wink.

 

“Don’t trust him,” Mark whispers as he grabs Jisung’s hand and laces their fingers together, trailing a distance behind the trio.

 

He had forgotten how much he loves the feeling of Jisung’s hand in his till he finally feels it again, the warmth and tingle of Jisung’s skin on his. He notes that Jisung’s also wearing the hoodie he’d left at his house many summers ago. He sees a collar peeking from underneath and he should have known when he saw Jisung carrying his backpack.

 

“You came straight from school?”

 

“Yeah, I didn’t want to miss you when you finished your lecture. I had to time everything perfectly.”

 

“It was perfect.” Mark smiles as he looks at him. “But you must be tired.”

 

“It’s ok. It’s Friday, there’s no school tomorrow.”

 

Mark hums. “You can crash in my room tonight and I’ll send you to the train station tomorrow.”

 

“Already thinking of getting rid of me?” Jisung bumps their shoulders. “I’m hurt.”

 

“That’s not-”

 

“Relax hyung,” Jisung kisses his cheek. “I was just playing with you.”

 

\---

 

Dinner at the noodle place went smoothly. Just as how Mark’s predicted, his friends were absolutely charmed by Jisung and Jisung wasn’t even trying. Mark’s torn between feeling proud and jealous. Although they got along well, Mark noticed that at some point in the conversation Jisung’s mood had shifted slightly. It’s not blatantly obvious that his friends were aware but because Mark’s known him since forever, he knows when there’s something bothering him. He didn’t want to bring it up in front of his friends but he needed to make sure that Jisung was okay so he held Jisung’s hand under the table instead, to at least provide him some comfort and make him feel slightly more at ease. He doesn’t know if it’s something he or his friends had said but Jisung’s smile doesn’t quite reach up to his eyes and his laugh doesn’t sound as light as it usually does.

 

So when dinner ends and they’re all heading back to the dorms, Mark pulls Jisung away under the pretense of getting ice-cream.

 

Mark leads them to a park and they take refuge on a bench underneath a big, old tree. Jisung’s quiet, too quiet, and Mark wishes he would say what’s on his mind. But like kittens, Jisung needs time to open up.

 

“What happened to ice-cream?” Jisung asks, leaning back against the bench.

 

“We can still get it later, if you want.”

 

“You just wanted to keep me away from your friends didn’t you?” Jisung jokes.

 

“What do you think of them?” Mark asks, his hands clasped together in his lap.

 

“They’re nice and funny. And smart.” Jisung answers, looking down at his shoes. “I think all college kids are smart.”

 

“We try,” Mark laughs. He bumps his shoulder with Jisung’s. “You’re smart too. Probably smarter than all of us really.”

 

“Me?” Jisung asks incredulously. He shakes his head. “I’m just… a high school kid. I’m nowhere near as good as any of you.”

 

Mark frowns. “Why’d you bring yourself down like that? It doesn’t matter that you’re in high school. You’re unbelievingly smart. And independent. You’re _great_ at dancing, you’re considerate and you’re so selfless – do you want me to go on? Because I can.”

 

“No, stop.” Jisung smiles but it’s weak. He’s still looking down instead of at Mark. “It doesn’t count when it comes from you.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“Because you’re my boyfriend,” he mumbles.

 

“All the more it should! Because it means that I know you well enough.”

 

“Hyung,” Jisung says, his voice timid and his shoulders hunched. “Do you ever just… feel like you don’t belong?”

 

There it is.

 

The thing that’s been keeping his mind occupied.

 

It’s an issue they’ve dealt with in the past. It’s one of the reasons why Mark’s promised he won’t drink just so Jisung wouldn’t feel bad or left out. Jisung shouldn’t feel like he doesn’t belong with Mark. Because he does. His rightful place is by Mark’s side, in Mark’s arm, just anywhere as long as he’s there with Mark. Mark feels sorry he wasn’t able to convince Jisung enough to believe it. Sorry that he hadn’t been there to push the doubts away when the doubts kept coming back. But Jisung _does_ belong with him and it’s more true than anything he has ever believed in.

 

“Sung,” Mark’s says softly and it comes out sounding sad, just like the expression on Jisung’s face. “Where is this coming from?”

 

“I just feel like we don’t belong together. We’re so different - look at you, then look at me. I’m not… I’m not right for you.”

 

Mark wishes he would look up at him. “Don’t say that.”

 

“I know we’ve talked about this before. But I’ve had a lot of time to think. Whenever we call, you’re always having to do something after, or rushing off somewhere. It’s so different, your life and mine. And then when you talk about your friends, they sound really cool and great and I feel like a sore thumb in your life because I don’t fit in with that description. I’m just this kid you met and fell in love with because you don’t know any better.”

 

“Sung, you know I don’t feel that way. It’s not like that at all.”

 

A tear drops from his face onto the ground. He’s crying quietly but Mark isn’t able to comfort him because he has defensive stance. The way he puts some distance between them and how he keeps his hands in the pocket of his hoodie, he doesn’t want Mark near. He’s putting up a wall.

 

“And then actually coming here and seeing your friends and your world, I feel like you should really meet someone that’s right for you. I’m just holding you back. Whenever I think about us, I think about how you have this person back home who’s too young to understand or do anything. Too much of a burden, always have to be taken care of, always needs reassurance and love. This kid who stops you from drinking and having a good time with your friends.”

 

“Sung, that’s not true. You know you’re not any of those things. You’re the reason why I try new things and go beyond my comfort zone. Because you know my potential and you push me to achieve it. You could never be holding me back.”

 

Jisung sniffles. “You’re just saying that. Your friends even called me your ‘baby boyfriend’.”

 

Mark should really talk to his friends about that.

 

“It’s because they like you and find you cute.” Mark takes a chance and shifts closer. Jisung thankfully isn’t repelled by it.

 

“Do you think I’m too young?” JIsung finally turns to look at him. His eyes are red and wet and Mark feels a hundred times worse.

 

“No, of course not.”

 

“You’re lying,” he says in a small voice.

 

“Okay maybe I did, but I got over it and decided to confess to you anyway. And I never regretted it at all.”

 

“Wouldn’t you want someone better than me? Surely college guys match you better than I do.”

 

Mark gently pulls Jisung’s hands out from his pocket and he holds them in his. “Sung, I don’t want or need a college boyfriend if that’s what you’re suggesting. I don’t care if you think you’re a ‘baby boyfriend’ or a shitty boyfriend or a good-for-nothing boyfriend. Because I know you’re none of those. You’re my boyfriend because I like you. You belong here, beside me, with me.”

 

Mark wipes away the tears on his face and caresses his cheeks gently. “So don’t think you’re below me or not good enough. I’m the one who needs to do better. You came all the way here for goodness sake. I promise I’ll do better. I won’t make you feel that way ever again.”

 

“Hyung, you’re really sappy,” Jisung mumbles in between sniffles. He gives a small smile and Mark can tell it’s a sincere one. “I’m sorry for feeling this way. It’s just- being back home, with all the places we’ve been to together, I get reminded of you. And because I see it every day, I think about you every day too. You’re lucky you’re all the way here because there’s nothing to remind you of our first date, or our first kiss. Or when we had that snowball fight. Or the little carving we did at the tree in the park. But I do, I see it and I think about us. And it makes me miss you so much that I think it annoys you with how much I text and call you. And then all these thoughts come in, telling me that maybe I’m not right for you. And I know I shouldn’t entertain them, but sometimes I can’t help it.”

 

Mark’s heart sinks because he hadn’t known. He hadn’t known that Jisung felt that way, and he should have realized earlier. Of course. Jisung has to see all those reminders of them every day and it must have been hard to depend only on memories to make the days go by. He should have called Jisung more often, sent him more texts and check up on him more frequently. He’s such an idiot.

 

“I’m sorry I didn’t realise that. And I didn’t do anything to make it better for you. But I want you to know that you’re never a burden to me. I look forward to your calls every single time. You can never make me get tired of you.”

 

He lifts Jisung’s chin up to make their eyes meet. “Thank you for being with me.”

 

“Hyung, stop you’re being really sappy,” Jisung whines.

 

Mark leans in and pecks him on the lips. “I mean it.”

 

“Don’t you think I deserve a little more? I came all the way here because I missed you.”

 

Before Mark can even reply, Jisung’s already closing the distance between them again and he fits their lips together. He wraps his arms around Mark’s neck and he kisses so sweetly that Mark can tell just how much Jisung misses him. Mark’s fingers card themselves in Jisung’s hair and he angles Jisung’s head to kiss him better, more deeply, more tenderly. Jisung opens up to him and his stomach flutters and his heart pumps ferociously. He holds Jisung close and the warmth and familiarity of it all comes rushing back, making him giddy. Their lips slide against each other and it’s hot and a bit sloppy and it’s a sensation he wants to get familiar with again.

 

“Jisung,” he breathes out against Jisung’s mouth. “I love you.”

 

Jisung kisses him even harder and pulls back a fraction to reply. He whispers the exact same words against Mark’s lips before he kisses Mark all over again.

 

\--

 

Mark wakes up because the sunlight is shining so brightly that it penetrates his eyelids. He turns his head and sees that Renjun’s bed is empty. Just as it should be because he crashed at Donghyuck’s and Jaemin’s last night. But the space beside him on his bed is empty as well and that shouldn’t be the case.

 

Mark gets up and pads towards the bathroom only to find it empty. He starts to panic because he thinks maybe Jisung had gone to the train station on his own. Maybe he hadn’t want to wake Mark up so he had left quietly. Mark starts grabbing decent clothes and finding his socks, frantically combing his fingers through his hair. He had promise to be a better boyfriend just yesterday and he’s already failing. He knocks his head against his study table in his search for socks when he sees Jisung’s school bag lying in the corner.

 

That means Jisung hadn’t left yet. But he’s not here either. Mark thinks maybe he went out to have a look around and got himself lost. Mark’s about to call Jisung and rush out the door to find him when the door opens. Jisung stands in the doorway.

 

“You’re awake!” He beams.

 

“Where did you go?” Mark asks breathlessly. “I thought you left, but then I saw your bag and then I thought maybe you got lost, so I wanted to go look for you but-”

 

“Hyung, you’re rambling.” Jisung walks past him and lifts a plastic bag he had been carrying. “I got breakfast!”

 

He places the plastic bag on the floor and sits, gesturing for Mark to do the same.

 

“I was planning to get us breakfast. But thank you,” Mark says as he sits opposite of Jisung. “How did you know where to find food? The closest place is a fifteen minutes’ walk away.”

 

“Funny story. I did get lost, but! I bumped into Donghyuck hyung. He was getting breakfast too.”

 

“Hyuck? That’s surprising. He usually isn’t up so early.” Mark opens the plastic bag and sees two sets of porridge. He sets one in front of Jisung and places the other in front of him.

 

“That’s what he told me too. He said Renjun’s and Jaemin’s snoring combined are too horrific to handle.”

 

Mark’s glad Donghyuck was there to help. But knowing Donghyuck, he’d probably indulged Jisung in some _interesting_ conversation.

 

“Did you guys talk?”

 

“Yeah, he talks a lot.” Jisung laughs. “Told me some interesting things.”

 

His gut-feel was right.

 

“Like what?” He passes Jisung a spoon and tells him to eat while it’s still hot.

 

“Like how I’m the only person whose number is saved with a nickname in your phone.” Jisung makes it a point to look at him with his eyebrows raised. “Or that you don’t like to talk about me with them because you don’t want to _share_ me. Really hyung?”

 

Mark coughs at the intake of air into the wrong pipe.

 

“He also told me that I remind him of when he was in high school.”

 

“Why is that?”

 

Jisung takes a spoonful of porridge and blows at it before feeding it to Mark.

 

“Because he fell in love with his boyfriend when he was in high school too. Says he knows how it feels like to have a boyfriend who’s a few years older and that the gap felt especially big when he was in high school and his boyfriend in college. Kind of like us right now. He says if I ever needed someone to talk to, I can talk to him. He gave me his number.” 

 

Mark hadn’t known Donghyuck had that side to him. He thinks it’s really nice of him to do that for Jisung. He reminds himself to tell Donghyuck that in person.

 

Mark watches Jisung eat his porridge and he starts thinking about Jisung while Jisung’s right there in front of him. He thinks about how much time they’ve spent knowing each other. He thinks back to those days they wasted their summer and winter breaks together, thinks about the mischief they got up to, thinks about when he first realized he likes Jisung, thinks about their transition from friends to boyfriends. He thinks about where they’ll be in years to come. It seems like Jisung’s thinking the same thing too because he voices it out.

 

“You know hyung, one year from now I’ll be in college too.”

 

“That’s right,” Mark says, looking at him affectionately. “It’s crazy how time flies.”

 

“I thought about it. And I think that even though all my thoughts and worries are significant to me right now, maybe when I’m in college and I look back to my high school self, I’ll realise how silly I was to worry about all those things.”

 

Mark reaches over to push Jisung’s hair away from his face and he lets his hand slide down to his cheek. “If you’re already thinking that way, it shows that you’re already learning and growing from your problems. You had a dilemma yesterday and today you’re already so wise about.” Mark leans in to leave a chaste kiss on his lips. “Look at you.”

 

Jisung holds Mark’s hand that’s caressing his face. “But I didn’t do it alone. You’ll be there to guide me in the future too, won’t you?”

 

Mark looks at him tenderly. “Where else would I be?”

 

Jisung grins, bright and overwhelming, like how he always does. “I thought so too.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know if there are plot holes or if the story flows well because it was quite rushed. I wanted to finish it before Jisung's birthday ended so I didn't have that much time to check through but i really hope it turned out okay!
> 
> Happy birthday to NCT's baby <3


End file.
